BREAKING FAKE NEWS:
Prime Real Estate Package Deal Has Green Light.
New Gold Plated DAPL Tower at Standing Rock, ND will offer River Views, breathtaking barricade vistas, hot red clay mud baths with pepper spray on the side, Border Patrol helicopter rides, and 24/7 security by Morton County, ND free of charge. Please do not tip the Police as it breeds bad legal habits.
Never-ending junk food buffet offered 24/7 with Room Service menu offering only the best GMO corn feed beef steaks taxpayer money can buy.
Book your rooms today!
For an extra fee booking of just $250,000 you too can attend the ribbon cutting grand opening with Melania wielding the scissors. We’ve secured her appearance with a fee which will remain undisclosed in respect for her privacy.
Be advised: No Water Protectors, Native or Non-Native, will be allowed to rent rooms. There will be no Prayer Ceremonies except for those performed by the Deluxe Red Apple Band.
Can’t wait to see you in North Dakota after the climate changes and the palm trees have taken root and leafed out.
Myron Dewey ~ Digital Smoke Signals Drones at Work
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All ads appear via WordPress and have NO connection to me whatsoever–damn. Thanks for visiting my blogcasa and don’t forget #WaterIsLife visit http://www.defunddapl.org to make your money talk when it walks out of big banks funding dirty fossil fuel pipelines.
Why do I have the feeling I’m going to run these two words into the ground?
Oh the reality show aka American politics needs a rating boost.
Let’s get an orange to spin the ratings machine.
OOOps!
Too much reality SHOW.
Four wheel drive can not deal with this spin.
Too much for the snow tires with chains to handle.
Orange Julius for everyone!
No, I want an Orange Crush!
–And I want it NOW!
Where’s a tanning machine when you need one?
Easy, easy there’s enough solar energy for all the mainstream news anchors to get a healthy looking tan. You’ll all be a nice even orange tone in no time at all.
Why not take a load off on the day after Thanksgiving, sleep in, then lounge around in your pajamas with family and friends?
Why not have a stress free no shop till you drop day this coming Friday?
Loiter in the living room listening to music, linger over leftovers, binge on favorite flicks, have a pumpkin pie party, play with your kids, spoon with your significant other, do anything but shop.
Why not?
Take some time out and chill out after all the political reality show insanity–which will probably still be ongoing when you return to the work week on Monday morning. If you need to detox this would be a good time to do it.
Tune out the non-stop advertising triggering your inner shop junkie addiction. Take another route to gift giving this season. Get creative and innovative about experiences, quality time, and engagement with those you love.
Why not give up emptying your wallet into the pockets of corporate CEOs?
Why not donate your time and/or money to a cause that you and a loved one believe in?
Why not spend the time you’d spend shopping for plastic toys actually playing with your children?
Why not invite friends over for a song and dance party as a gift?
Why not?
And if the corporate profit margins don’t cross the red line in to the black profit margin so what? What does corporate America do besides promote consumerism for its own executive gain? Oh and don’t forget that corporations pour money money money into politics for their own agendas serving only their interests. If you think they’re interested in serving your interests you’re delusional.
When you must shop, why not shop only at small, independent business struggling to compete with chain stores?
It’s all about value and values. What are yours?
One way to create positive change is to change how we spend our money–where, on what and why. Because yes money does talk–and we can direct the discourse when we make ours walk in directions of our choice.
So why not take the stress out of this Thanksgiving and take a time out from the tragic comedy aka political farce. Detox and recharge your personal batteries.
The bottom line is that no one really needs to shop at all this Friday.
Why not stay home and eat bonbons while watching all the episodes of Firefly then Serenity? Or whatever trips your stress relief trap.
Why not?
Detox. Refresh. Revive.
Oh and drink plenty of water because Water Is Life.
(side note: whatever ads may appear are solely the provance of wordpress and reflect no connection with moi. thank you for visiting.)
Try out your chops serving up a hearty dish of political satire.
It’s been brought to my attention that comedians are called to duty at MoveOn.org to slice and dice politics as they deem fit.
There is no entry fee. Everyone is welcome to enter–newbies and hard-core satirists alike. Satire is not required but it’s appreciated. You can be just flat out funny.
But time is running out and you must submit a video by August 11, 2016. So get crackin’ all you wise-arses with bells to ring and whistles to blow!
Choose your own reading adventure about Gov. Nixon’s efforts to defund the public library system:
Okay if you want a nice and polite run down of what’s going on with $6 Million in funds for the public libraries in Missouri — visit this lively link to Chris Arnone’s piece at BookRiot:
Missouri teens got a real fact check in how politicians operate and how much they rate on the Missouri Governor’s value scale on March 18, 2015 when the Governor’s staff lied to them about the governor being out-of-state and threatened to have them escorted out of their offices by State Troopers. You can read all about that shindig at BookRiot.
If you’re pressed for time, Chris Arnone has these suggestions for voicing your support for the libraries without threat of State Trooper escort:
Now for the not so nice and not polite reading adventure.
Damn how I love being able to connect with people everywhere via the internet. I’m lucky enough to have my own damn computer and private access that I can use any time I want 24/7. I’m also aware that there are many people in my local area who are not so damn fortunate. I’m reminded of this fact every time I visit the Kansas City, Missouri Public Library and see a fully packed computer room offering access to the internet for people who are not so damn lucky as myself. There’s always a waiting list and there are always people waiting for their online time. Many of them are looking for employment. Someone is always using the computers designated for creating resumes. Others are doing the exact same thing you are right now without giving it a second thought–enjoying surfing the net and flying around in cyberspace. In addition to these people there are those who bring their laptops to take advantage of the wireless access on site. My award wining public library is one damn electronic hot spot.
Why would anyone who values an informed and literate population want to deny people access to electronic information?
Yikes–conspiracy theories abound! 1984 anyone? Hmm? No need to ban books, just deny internet access.
For now I’ll fly with the people who deny access to others are people who prefer an ignorant, uneducated, uniformed bunch of dumbed down voters who are easily manipulated and controlled.
Am I suggesting that Missouri Gov. Jay Nixon is this ilk of politician?
Am I?
Well why else would he deny first $2,789,225 million in 2014 library funding then follow that up with withholding all of the state appropriated library funds of 2015 to the tune of $3,109,250 million?
Those funds provide libraries with everything needed for remote electronic access aka the REAL Program.
Imagine your life without your electronic connection–the very one you are enjoying right now as you read this on your internet connection of choice wherever you are.
What the fuck is Gov. Nixon up to with these millions of dollars? Does he have a fundraiser in mind? Who is he paying off?
Maybe his staff would like to monetarily thank the Missouri State Troopers for their on call assistance for escorting NON-professional, NON-corporate lobbyists out of their offices when they come, with appointments, to discuss their concerns about what’s really going on in Nixon’s brainbox?
Perhaps Gov. Nixon just can’t stand teenagers with fully functioning minds enabled by equally concerned adults snooping around the state capital looking for some answers and questioning some “family” values.
Aside: Last week I had some of those nice people who like to share the good word door to door. I told them they should go to the state capital and share their words with those folks. The older gentleman escorting and mentoring the two very clean-cut young whippersnappers practicing their word sharing said, and I quote: “They aren’t interested in listening to us.”
Hmm, according to Arnone over at Book Riot some elected officials were interested in hearing what was on the library supporting teenagers’ minds. I guess those might have been the ones who realize these young people will be voting in a few years and possibly becoming engaged in political issues as adults.
Clearly Gov. Nixon doesn’t give a rat’s ass about what book reading, literate, computer savy teenagers think or do–unless it involves sex education,. Oopsy daisy–can you get that kind of info on the internet? Hell yeah, you can.
Shit! The clock is ticking and I have an event to attend at the local library branch where, in addition to the wonderful group of people who work there, I’ll meet some of the other people who participated in the adult reading program face to face. I’ll come back to cyberspace later–after library hours, in the wee hours of the morning or late at night or in the middle of the day. Any time I want electronic access I’ve got it. Not everyone does. They ONLY get it from the public library.
What are you up to with all those millions that belong to the public libraries, not just the big ones but the little ones too where someone is searching for everything libraries offer in this electronic age, Gov. Jay Nixon? Hmm? Nothing good, says my cynical mind, nothing good at all.
Please share the word about this monetary crisis threatening the public libraries in Missouri via your electronic devices and favorite social media vices. You don’t have to live in Missouri to share the information. Heads up, your public library funds may be on the funnel tunnel to somewhere else too–if they haven’t already gone done that pipe.
Visit the Kansas City Public Library at http://www.kclibrary.org/ to get a gander of what they’re doing soooo very very right.
In case you haven’t guessed by now, my new year’s resolution #2 was to get back online and blog. Now don’t get all pissy because it’s #2 instead of #1. Numero uno was checking email for the first time in MONTHS. Yeah, now that I’ve found out all about who’s been naughty and nice, read Christmas Letters to Satan, had a few laughs thanks to Bear and Berit, discovered my offspring INTENDS to put in an appearance on the new home front in a matter of weeks–goddamn it, she’s been gone for YEARS, what’s this prodigal daughter bullshit? Huh? I’m kidding. Okay not so much. Yeah, just kidding. Or not.
Anyway, long overdue greetings to anyone out there who’s paying one whit of attention to what’s NOT been going on in my blogcasa.
Am I supposed to feel guilty about this neglect?
Well, I do.
Sort of.
But–if you all knew what I know–you’d be grateful for the resounding silence here. Oh yeah.
I’ve been debating on what this first post of 2015 should be about for a couple of weeks: the holidays, films, books, horrible current events, –are there ever any wonderful events? I think not. –Sarge and Lily updates (yeah their story is ongoing), random thoughts about old dark British crime dramas such as Wire In the Blood and Touching Evil and what they reveal about the people who write the scripts, etc. . . .
Obviously NONE of the above has been taking up any wall space here. Nope.
I have decided to share one tiny suggestion for anyone considering making a long-term commitment to a significant other of any variety. Yep. There may be fallout from this, but– that’s okay. Feel free to prove me wrong about this notion.
Forget pre-commitment counseling. Forget talking through all your hopes and dreams for a shared future. Don’t bother getting all your duckies in a row. If you really want to know what you’re in for with each other — MOVE.
You read that right–MOVE. As in take all your material shit from one place and put it in another-and see what happens. See who does what–and how they do it. Listen to what’s being said. Who decides what goes where and why. Have you got a leg dragger as a partner in moving crimes? A non-stop whiner? A get the job done no matter what mind working full steam ahead? Is your “other” taking time out for all the other things that need doing–like watching every episode of something called “Haven” nonstop? Who is willing to make midnight runs to empty huge trash bins because there’s NO way the trash truck can haul ALL the bags away at one time? –This requires a certain sense of humor and willingness to fight the wind blowing it all back at you again and again and again. Are you ready to BANISH your partner from the moving site because all they keep saying is: “We’re never going to get this done. Never in a million years.” Frankly, who needs to hear that while getting it done? Hmm? Can you imagine someone saying that while a baby is being born? Better not to go there, right?
Seriously–if you want to get to know someone conduct a major move of worldly goods with them. I think some enterprising spirit could make a mint setting up a couple of abodes for people to ‘practice move’ in and out of in order to find out who their partner really is when it comes down to the nitty-gritty that’s involved in moving. Obviously hiring OTHER people to do the work defeats the purpose–unless your partner does this and leaves you to direct the hired help. That would tell you something important right there, wouldn’t it?
Bubble wrap–check.
Reusable grocery bags–check.
Cardboard boxes–check.
Duct tape–check.
Full tank of gas–check.
Keys–check.
Attitude adjustment–check.
Yeah, I missed you too. Oh come on, why would I lie about it? Huh?
Yeah, I’m a running a tad behind with this round of theme music, Hunger. These things happen when you don’t pay attention to what day of the week it is AND you leave your timer somewhere out of sight so you can’t press the set hour time alarm button. I have no idea where the little green device is–except that it is somewhere in the house. Somewhere being the operative word. Time seems to be what I hunger for the most lately. As for hunger for food–don’t get me started. Other hunger costs more than a quarter a day to satisfy.
alt- J ~ Hunger of the Pine ~
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Bob Wayne ~ Hunger In My Soul from Till the Wheels Fall Off
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As soon as I read Bear’s theme choice was hunger this song came to mind–so here it is, complete with a fun fan compiled visual handbook . . . . hmmmm, yeah.
Meatloaf ~ You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth (Hot Summer Night)~
🙂 Yeah, the television tubes have been flooded with retakes and remakes of fairytale galore in recent seasons. It’s been virtual Grimm’s gag-fest galore. Some results have been gleefully giddy good Grimm fun galore and others have been romantic soap operas deluxe. Have you been suitably chastised about the perils of talking to strangers, wandering off in the woods, and greedy beanstalks? Some of us are awaiting the return of the modern Grimm Reapers complete with popcorn couch parties in the works.
Just when the market seems saturated with all kinds of re-workings of cautionary and sleeping beauty tales along comes the ultimate Cinder-rella—a glorious human-cyborg teenage girl with attitude, smarts and guts like none other. She lives in New Beijing with her wicked stepmother and sisters. With a few twists of her screwdrivers she can replace an outgrown metal foot or carve her name into the heart of the sort of charming pin-up poster Prince Kai. But before there will be any hot kissy faces there’s a plague to fight, an evil auntie to dethrone, a mystery or two to unravel and friends to make along the way.
Oh the glories of teen fiction. 🙂
Marissa Meyer’s young adult spin gives the Cinderella story an overhaul like none other and I love it. The thing about writing for young adults is that you can’t miss a beat and expect your audience to stick along waiting for you to get back on board with the fun and games. Meyer’s never missteps in Cinder or in the other tomes that continue the story. Scarlet–Little Red Riding Hood has never been so full of piss and vinegar –and partial to the Big Bad-ass Wolf. Going where Grandma has gone is a tad more risky than a walk in the woods, but that doesn’t stop single-minded Scarlet from going hunting with Wolf watching her back-side. And then there’s Cress—ha, this Rapunzel is a computer genius with her fingertips on the pulse of the universe. Big Brother move over cause little sis has things to do and secrets to secret for her own escape agenda. Disney never will top this rendition of the long tressed girl in a tower. No way. Ever see a blind man rescue his lady in waiting? The brash, vain Captain Carswell Thorne doesn’t let anything keep him down –ever. So he’s been blinded by crash landing into the Sahara–who cares? Crsss is MIA and he’s going after her –cane and overly ethical escort droid in hand.
Ahhhh three books are ready for reading NOW–and Winter is coming in 2015. Snow White is clearly some kind of head case with teen angst to spare. I don’t suggest leaving out any bread crumbs or candy–this crew is too hungry for love and life to go backwards –ever.
But some people don’t want to think about that reality.
~Why not?
Because then they’d have to learn a new history.
~Ooops–but isn’t history supposed to be true and honest?
Depends on who is using which facts to support which version of what happened.
~Are you saying people manipulate facts to suit their own agendas?
Me? Why would I ever say something like that? It might be politically incorrect, and we can’t have that, can we?
~Hmm, but what’s Politically Correct for one group isn’t necessarily PC for another group. And people do have a tendency to abuse PC everywhere in order to create conflict and sometime even abuse other people who had no intentions of abusing anyone. There’s been some very rough irony involved in demands for PC over the years.
No way! Who would do something like that?
~Who doesn’t? Come on, look at the conservative media, the scared shitless media, the controlled media, the alternative media, the foreign media, the underground media, the social media–everyone spins everything to suit their vision of reality, right?
Do you think that’s what pissed off those high school kids in Colorado so much that they pretested in the streets about changes in what history would be taught?
~What do you think?
I’m not sure yet. But–I do recall what happened in Arizona with the Mexican-American Studies program being shut down because it presented a different viewpoint of history than what the TPTB wanted taught in schools.
~Hey, are you saying there’s a conspiracy to teach lies in American schools?
Look, I don’t go in for conspiracy theories. But I don’t think this is a coincidence either. Maybe it’s just like minds acting out in similar ways. Or not.
~ Like minded people, right. Ah ha.
ACT II:
Lie. Lie. Lie.
Deny lying and lie some more.
Because if the truth is known the people might rebel.
There’s a very good chance they’ll refuse to be cannon fodder.
They might even learn other languages in order to talk to the rest of the world about issues that affect everyone.
Or not.
ACT III:
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Howard Zinn on Honesty In History
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Humor ~~ Warning! Contains Sarcasm, Irony and Questioning of Authority
If you’re still in the dark about the history curriculum issue in Colorado:
Yes, it has finally gotten to the point where I can no longer refrain from have a jolly good rant about three words that have been abused so thoroughly by the writers of television programs, movies and by the social media addict generation. I can’t wait to no longer hear: Amazing, Awesome and Complicated—as in the utterly useless, evasive phrase, “It’s complicated.” never ever uttered again.
You’ve heard them all. I know you have because they’re impossible to avoid these days no matter if you’re in a coffee-shop, the grocery store or the hardware store.
Amazing implies a fair degree of wonder and surprise. How many ways can people or things be called amazing? Really? What ever happened to you look very lovely or very handsome? That’s a beautiful dress or a very flattering suit–but I’m not astonished at your appearance. Nope, I’m not, sorry.
Awesome, hmmm, I guess this word conveys open-mouth, drop dead AWE and Shock of that inspiring AWE that has pulled the rug out from under our flat feet. My meddlesome mind associates Awe–some or a little of it–with truly above ordinary events and things. Dresses, food, shoes, hairdos, cars are far too mundane things to be imbued with real awe. Who wants to talk Nuclear Bombs? Hmm? Now those are fully aweinspiring in many ways—from their power of destruction to views of the aftermath of their deployment.
It’s Complicated–wtf? Is this or is this not the most banal evasive phrase ever uttered in response to any inquiry about human behavior?
“Why did you cheat on your significant other?”
“It’s Complicated.”
I bet it is: pheromones and hormones influence humans in very complex ways. Don’t you just adore your nose? The Complicated things it tells your brain are Amazing and Awesome beyond compare.
Language, it’s Complicated.
Or are people simply too damn lazy to go beyond using stock phrases?
For the hell of it:
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And then there’s :
It’s terribly complicated, dreadfully awesome and downright utterly amazing.
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For the very first post enter "Breakfast Special, #1" and/or scroll through older entries; second helping = Railroad Crossing; third helping, Close Shave; fourth helping, People? Really Now; fifth helping, Pussy No More; sixth helping, 'book ends'; seventh helping, Odds? What Odds?; eighth helping, Do You Dig Pink Flamingoes Dancing in the Snow and Blue Lights?; ninth helping, Old Reliable Jack; tenth helping, Snowing Deep Sleep; eleventh helping, Connecting; twelth helping, Equations; #13, The Most Important Meal of the Day; from then on enter into search box Breakfast Special and a number such as: #14, #15, #16 and so on.
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47whitebuffalo's Blog 
Monologue #1
December 9, 2016 at 2:39 am (creative writing, entertainment, humor, random, Uncategorized, Writing)
Tags: commentary, humor, monologue, Writing
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